I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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