god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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