Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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