OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
