it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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