I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Two words: nipple clamps
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