problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
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