Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
