I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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