Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
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He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i drank out of a bidet.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
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He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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