I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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