i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
i need some magic done to my vagina
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize