I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
What a dumb baby whore.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
