Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
