i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize