problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
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i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
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I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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