Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize