Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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