i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
