My pussy is not your playground.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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