White coat. Heels.
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
