I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
