gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
