Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Randomize
