exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
