people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Randomize
