You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I don't think brook has ever known best
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
