Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
