I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
