Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
