i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
