"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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