I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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