I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
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