Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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