they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
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I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
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So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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