thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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