Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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