I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize