mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
