it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
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