he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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