Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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