god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
