I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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