Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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