he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
You are a genius and a whore.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize