Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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