i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
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In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
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One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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