I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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