addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
